There is never an ideal time to have an argument.
But one of the worst cases is when a fight starts up and there’s only a small window of time to discuss it.
This is when you’ll need those effective communication skills to help resolve the relationship problems.
Early morning before it’s time to get out the door. Saturday afternoon just before the in-laws come over.
You want to end the argument so you don’t spend the rest of the day thinking about it and steeping in resentment.
But that’s not an easy thing to do when the clock is ticking.
So how do you reach an agreement when time is not on your side?
We set a time limit — 20 minutes — and asked a variety of experts for their approach.
It’s not easy. But the key is to use forward-thinking, a good dose of empathy, and shut your mouth when a decision has been reached.
Most importantly: go into the argument understanding what the goals are and, like Tony Stark, work towards that endgame.
1. Empathize and anticipate
2. Understand everyone’s needs
3. Negotiate and bargain
4. Take a clue from the Time Lord
This one comes courtesy of the Time Lord.
5. Don’t confuse solutions and emotions
6. Whatever you do, don’t try to get the final word
If you arrive at the end of the conversation, and a resolution is in sight, you have to trust that the resolution will be implemented. And then stop talking about it.
“Even with the best intentions, you’re only setting yourself up to derail the progress you just made”
Video: HERE (Esther Perel)